"YOU HAVE THE NERVE TO DRESS UP A TURD AND CALL IT A CARAMEL"

...is the inspiration for our less than inspiring monthly award. Here we do NOT discriminate. There are no sacred cows. High and low beware!

Our CARAMEL statuette is derived from the traditional cagané figure or 'shitter' from the northeastern Spanish region of Cataluña where no manger scene can be found without one. It's attributes are far more prosaic here.

After more than ten years teaching Drawing and Color Theory at the Parsons School of Design Department of Continuing Education, a teacher was terminated on Thursday, 19 December 2002, the day after his last class of the semester, AND INSTRUCTED NEVER TO ENTER CAMPUS AGAIN OR ATTEND UNIVERSITY ACTYIVITIES. We'll refer to him as 'C'.

'C' started at Parsons around 1988. But for a two-year period in Minnesota (1991-1993), he taught at Parsons ever since without incident and to rave reviews from students, administrators and peers under three different department directors. Enter one RAMONA CANDY as department "Chair" and the problems begin.

That 'C' considered said Ms Candy unprofessional and disrespectful was no secret. An outspoken, straightforward individual who doesn't mince on words, he had told her himself. Passive-agressive ("Since you feel the New School mistreats you so, I suggest you remove yourself...", she says to him on their final interview) + inept + insecure = arrogant. QUALIFICATIONS? Presently artistic director of the Cultural Crossroads Dance Theatre Workshop of Brooklyn; formerly Dance Black America. What next, Les Ballets de Troccadero??? Certainly more suitable. ACHIEVEMENTS? Brooklyn's Women of Courage and Vision "Magnificent Dozen 2001" and her "Level of Incompetence", also in 2001. Where gender, race and tokenism, rather than brains and competence, are the main qualifiers in hiring and promotion, what else can the result be? They, in turn, fearing being upstaged, hire and promote more "brain dead". Thus the presence of lightweights and nincompoops like one David Solomita as Associate Director of CE. Her arrogance is that of the inept. As has become noxious practice in academia today, relevant professional qualifications for administrators, from university presidents on down, have been virtually eliminated. "High profile" matters. Fundraising, you see.... Educators, academicians, academic administrators need not apply. Politicians, ex-senators, peg-legged "war heroes" (even when their record is slightly tainted by small inconvenient allegations of war crimes and mass execution of civilians long, long, long ago....) are the order of the day. Fundraising, you see.... It's the dawning of the CORPORATE UNIVERSITY. As to the lesser characters, flunkies from industry and commerce.

That Ms Candy’s every act was vindictive and out of all proportion to the situation at hand is clear in view of the speed with which she processed this particular teachers termination and the Draconian measures taken. The meeting took place at 11AM on Thursday, the 19th of December. By 8:30AM Friday morning our teacher's internet account had been deleted and all files sequestered causing him to lose his entire database and invaluable internet address books. In the end, most though not all of said address books had to be released. This harassment caused him to default on professional obligations and resulted in loss of possible earnings far greater than what his salary at Parsons was worth.

The purported reason for his termination offered by Ms. Candy was entirely pre-textual (i.e. that he had refused to give his last group of students evaluation forms for his class, something that, to date, he had relished). All one need do is take a look at the dozens of evaluation form envelopes left in the CE faculty boxes at the end of any semester, uncollected and disregarded, never distributed to students and so never returned. He refused to do so on principle, in writing, stating that “where course content and instructor competence are not valued, these (evaluations) are pointless.”

I have read some of Parsons' Dean H. RANDOPLPH SWEARER's dismissive replies to ex-students who had the candor, kindness, decency and naïveté to reach out to him on this teacher's behalf. "Can't say how far you'll get with Randy Swearer, he doesn't read his e-mail. Lesley Cadman (Associate Dean) is rather non-involved", former staffer 'B' warned. "Non-involved", unresponsive. unreachable. Says our source, he sees his job as PR, promotion and damage control. “I hope you will continue to seek out educational opportunities that stimulate and challenge you. There is much to choose from here at Parsons.Ther is much to choose from at Parsons”, he assures in an e-mail to student 'S'. I beg to differ. There is NOT at Parsons Continuing Ed. His reply was disingenuous and demeaning. “Drawing With Color”, for example, cancelled in spite of repeated assurances from CE Associate Director Sodomita that semester, was instituted by a previous director because of the great demand from former students to continue studies with this particular instructor. “Drawing With Color” was designed and implemented by him based on a lifetime of struggles with the painting process. “Drawing With Color” is a unique course. And there is no one like him. Or is Dean Swearer saying we are all expendable or exchangeable? Then, what can you expect from a "dean" who ends a letter dismissing an appeal request by demanding to be taken off the teacher's distribution list and signs it "Randy".... On 5 February he writes: "Dear Mr C: I have received your email. At this point it would be most appropriate for you to direct any inquiries regarding your termination to the Vice President of Human Resources, Carole* Cantrell. Her telephone number is (212) 229-5671. I would appreciate it if you would take me off of your email distribution list. Thank you. Randy Swearer, Dean" * Can't spell his own director of H.R's name! How stupid and insensitive can you get? As if all this had nothing to do with him.... What does this man think he's there for? What can you expect? Last hails from Texas where yet another village is missing it's idiot! One of this "educator's" first and most notorious acts was to try to shut down one of New York City's oldest and most beloved ateliers, the Parsons print workshop and Printmaking program "rationalizing his arbitrary decision by calling the craft "out of tune with today's technology" and assigning the space, the classrooms and storage space are allotted currently to a "lovely" new Starbucks coffee outlet and more cafeteria space" according to Julia Simon, then a Freshman Foundation student, in a letter to acting president Scaturro dated 25 March 2000. A true man of Vision, a true man of the Arts, our dean Randy Swearer be. It appears the evasive H. Randolph Swearer hasn't had a picture taken in years for. In the months of research for this article, not a single photo of him was found, not in catalogues, not in books, not on the internet. We did find the one on the left, appropriate to the kind of "jack" this guy is. One would hope this incident would invite scrutiny into Parsons Continuing Education Department’s dismal performance since Ms Candy’s accession. To quote Hilton Kramer on an unrelated matter at Columbia University, “still another problem in urgent need of the administration’s critical attention. To ignore this farce is to risk becoming a laughing stock...” Not here. Bunker mentality.... The New School University will continue to be the second rate institution it has become, a house of cards.

The adjuncts who teach in our universities are the last of the indentured servants. They sign away their every right for measly fees when they sign their "contract", a worthless piece of paper that gives the university the power to dismiss them without a moment's thought or notice. For $541.34 per class per month. That adjuncts are mere peons to be disposed of at any administrator’s whim is bad enough. That there is no appeal process in place to deal with such matters at an institution that was once known as The New School “for Social Research”, was founded by radical immigrant Jews and hosts Diego Rivera murals is shameful. But then, this is NOT the New School for Social Research any more than the Parsons School of Design is the Parsons School of ART and Design. "Appeal process"!?!? When our teacher went to Dean Randy's office to try to make an appointment he was greeted by 4 security goons ( must've been their "grievance committee" ) posted outside Randy's offices in wait, barred from speaking to Randy's assistant and escorted out of the building. Adjuncts demand UAW Union representation as New School plainclothes security police keep a close watch. Carol Cantrell Vice President of "Human Resources" New School University The New School University virulently opposes and resists attempts by the adjuncts to unionize. It would, of course, be the end of their hegemony. No longer would the CAROL CANTRELLs (New School University's Vice President of Human Resources) have the audacity to end a letter of dismissal to a teacher with a threat to have him arrested if he ever attempted to enter New School University grounds or attend New School University activities. "I must take this opportunity to remind you that you are not permitted to access any university building or event and any attempt to do so will result in your arrest." Comments Professor 'D': Someone who uses English like that does not have the education for someone working with instructors at a university level." Later, the following message from New School University Security Chief Dieskau Reed to Ms Cantrell regarding a request for permission for our teacher to attend a student show he has been invited to is fortuitously forwarded to this writer by mistake, a "magic fluke". You'd think people associated to the Parsons School of DESIGN would know how to use e-mail. Subject: Re: Parsons show  View full header  From: "Dieskau Reed" <ReedD@newschool.edu>  Date: Mon, May 19, 2003 8:55 am To: <rcoane@atelier-rc.com>  Good morning Carol, I have not herard from the Detective, I will give him a call today andsee where we are at. This, to the individual in charge of dealing with employee issues. The first was her singular response, refusing all requests for meetings or even coming to the phone. In the second exchange she asks the Head of New School Security to have a detective tail or investigate our colleague. Yeah, RIGHT!!! As for her response to concerned students writing to protest the firing: "Parsons responded, very generic", writes student 'M'. "Swearer didn't even respond. He had some other lady (Cantrell) respond. She just ensured me that New School is doing everything that they can to solve the matter and that the matter cannot be discussed in detail because it is confidential. Yada yada." "Yada yada" alright! So disingenuous. Does she really expects others to swallow this fluff? What low opinions of their students they must have! Keila Tennent "Congoloozzah" Assistant General Counsel New School University Then there's the General Counsel (or Assistant General Counsel as is the case here), Candy-clone and Condoleezza Rice wannabe KEILA TENNENT. Another gem! First class poseur. All attitude and silk suit. Contentious, ostentatious, pretentious, demanding, unprofessional, rude. Cut from the same cloth. "Delay" is her game. See if it goes away.... In response to the many requests for a hearing, a review, an appeal, she writes: "Mr. C, we are getting numerous complaints from the individuals at Parsons about receiving unwanted emails from you. I have asked the specific individuals to give direct notice to you that your emails are unwanted. I understand, however, that you have been previously asked by members ofthe Deans office and specifically Randy Swearer to remove him from you e-mail list and refer any future concerns to either me or Carol Cantrell. Apparently, you have continued to email him and others notwithstanding such request. Please cease and desist from such activity. Sincerely, Keila Tennent" Grammar and punctuation, hers! Is this proper legalese or just plain bad English? Silk suits and posturing can't cover deficient language skills or breeding. To his attorney - "Understand however that there are no remaining university avenues for review of his case Keila Tennent" PUH-LEEZE, CONGOLOOZAH!!! 'SCU-U-U-U-U-USE MEE? You mean the four THUGS standing guard at Dean Randy's? That your idea of AVENUES OF REVIEW?!?!?! You are so blatant, so transparent, so unconvincing..., S0-0-0-0-0-0 annoying....

They have the gall to call themselves "progressive", these yahoos! Fascists hiding behind the facade of what was once a great progressive institution. Scratch a liberal, find a fascist! The entire institution subsists these days on ONE department: FASHION! It is FASHION that pushed the ART out of Parsons School of ART and Design. That department subsists thanks to key players in the fashion industry like Donna Karan and to the thousands of young Asian females of monied families who pay through the nose to come to New York City to study Fashion with the well connected and end up "yellow cabs" in the back pages of the Village Voice in order to finance their fashion fix.

Do you suppose this self-absorbed cadre of "concerned educators" has any clue as to what I'm talking about?

Even as this "institution of higher learning" hemorrhages financially, president ROBERT "Bob" KERREY, our war hero (alleged war criminal) come senator come academic fundraiser, squanders millions gutting out, renovating and decorating the lobby and second floors of 55 West 13th Street ( the "Knowledge Union", talk about pretension! )and his new townhouse residence at 21 West 11th Street in Manhattan.Sparing no expense to accommodate president "BOB", a New School University guard stands 24-hour watch at the presidential palace.
How does he DOOO it on...$541.34 per class per month?!?!?!

New School University President Robert 'Bob' Kerrey

Sez about Robert Kerrey the NEW YORK PRESS in "The 50 Most Loathesome New Yorkers", an article in the 26 March 2003 issue: "When the bug-eyed former senator and current New School prez got word that the New York Times was about to publish an article asserting his involvement in a massacre of Vietnamese civilians in 1969, he came forward a few days ahead of time to give his own version of the story -- and was immediately applauded for his courage in facing up to his 'painful' past despite the fact that 1) he'd sat on the story for 32 years and 2) the real pain was on the other side of the machine gun. Kerrey is the face of that bloated, self-centered America that somehow still manages to see itself as the victim in VietNam -- as though its pseudo-literary 'loss of innocence' and, in this case, ruined political prospects, somehow compare to two million actual dead people and a mine-strewn countryside of ravaged moonscapes."

Where ideas are lacking, lies must suffice. It has come to our attention from reliable, informed, inside sources that CE Chair Ramona Candy had accused teacher 'C' of "threatening" her and yet there has never been a criminal complaint, an order of protection served, a harassment suit filed.... "There is no evil so great that it cannot be exaggerated", posits Robert Hughes in “Culture of Complaint”, and exaggerate Ms Candy certainly does. Thus the extreme security measures. Never at the New School University has anyone ever witnessed such a display. Writes Professor 'DW' in a letter of appeal to Prez Kerrey:

"I and a number of other faculty were in the faculty computer lab that afternoon and had seen him leave to go to the meeting he told me then he had requested with the Dean of Parsons. Not too long after that, he was back with a guard, under orders to pack and leave the campus. He had not been allowed to see the Dean, but had been met there by armed guards, after information had been passed that he was violent.

I have known X for two years. He is often rude and cranky, and unaccountably refuses to look at the new photos of my grandchildren, but violent he is not."

I am sure Ramona Candy WAS threatened.... INTELLECTUALLY! I'm sure she felt her authority threatened, or her "pride". People who have achieved their "level of incompetence" are deeply insecure people who generally feel threatened by anyone more qualified than them. And it is their mindset to deal through threats, lies and innuendo, this incestuous cabal. "Just fuckin' lazy. Throws everything at Marcia (CE's office assistant) and does shit all day", says staffer 'T'.

There ARE those who confuse discourse with vomit!
"What makes Parsons special? The people of course. Whether the design professionals who compose the faculty, the internationally diverse student body, or the staff ready to assist you, Parsons is about people" posits president Kerrey. "And, this university must not be afraid to take a position on the critical issue of the day - how do the people of the world peacefully live together*? We're doing it here in New York City, and we at this university believe we can carry that to the rest of the world", vomits Kerrey. What blather! What bluster! What a clown!!!
 
More pointedly, professor 'DW' continues in her letter:
"I suggest that administrators with so little perception of character, and so little acquaintance with the people working for them, should not hold such positions at the University. Nor do I think that artists can necessarily be held to the standards of decorum of historians.

The University has humiliated a good man and my friend. All of us who saw what happened were degraded by that event. The University collectively makes loud noises about oppressed peoples in third- and fourth-world countries, plus agitates against non-union delicatessens. Human dignity and ethical stances belong first of all within the university community."

People minded, caring Kerrey who *"must not be afraid to take a position on the critical issue of the day - how do the people of the world peacefully live together" never replied....
Our terminated teacher? I am that teacher.

"I know what it feels to work hard and be suddenly dismissed without any consideration. That's why I don't expect any consideration at all from any corporation, much less an educational institution....I still would like to believe in the human being but am more and more disgusted about what I witness, and your case is no exception," wrote to me staffer "G" in a beautifully poetic note. And this is, sadly, the true state of affairs.

To dean Randy, who keeps complaining about being copied on my e-mails, I last wrote:
"...as long as you are Dean of the Parsons School of Design, you WILL be copied on all relevant
correspondence. Remember, you chose to ignore me when, in good faith and trust, I appealed to you.
Live with the consequences. You will not turn a deaf ear to me. And, hopefully, in the future, you will treat your adjunct faculty with the dignity and respect they deserve. It's not over till it's over and it won't be over till the (black) lady sings. Soon."

The time is now. Psalms 91:9-12 condemns those who intentionally try to stumble others,"It is better for him to get a great millstone, hang it around his neck, and jump in the ocean." I am Ramona Candy's MILLSTONE. I am her biggest failure, her greatest nightmare and her worst mistake. I remain relentless and unforgiving. I remain brash, loud, obnoxious, crotchety, cantankerous, cranky, and refuse to look at photos of anyone's grandchildren. If I liked human larvae I would've had some of my own. I remain unapologetic, unbowed and unscathed, without regrets or remorse and with my professional record, personal integrity and dignity intact.

In the end, what else is there, $541.34 per class per month?
"The man is richest who can call his time his own."

I dare anyone at the New School University to challenge this statement.
I don't make empty threats. I don't make false promises. I don't lie.
EVER!